Just One More Time Around . . .

I am not one to arrive early for anything.  On time or a minute late; that is more my style.   So I knew things were too good to be true when my bag was already packed for my 9:20 am flight the night before my departure.

It should not have come as a surprise when I slowly awoke to my alarm 45 minutes after it started playing.  

Crap!

I wanted to be leaving for the airport in 15 minutes and I am just waking up now?  

"It's OK it's OK," I told myself; "You are already packed, You can still do this."

So I powered through my morning routine and called for the Black Car service with my smart phone App.

Technology has advanced to the point that I can "drop a pin" on the image of a map on my cell phone to indicate where and when I want to be picked up.  Despite the fact that I am fairly confident on where the door of my condo is located, for some reason the Black Car service always shows up a block away on the other side of the street. 

"Mr. Just Jon, your car service is here.  Where are you?" the driver said upon calling my cell phone.

"I am standing where I dropped the pin on the map.  Where are you?"

"Well Sir, the GPS told me to make a right turn."

"Is the pin at a right turn?"

"No."

"Turn around and cross the street.  I am standing outside...where the pin was dropped."

I have gotten quite used to having this same conversation with every driver that has come to pick me up.

Now let the record state that I live REALLY close to the airport.  I am talking super convenient.  So when the Black Car service driver asked what time my flight was (2 hours from the point of his arrival) his response was, " Oh you are going to get there way early.  Plenty of time!"

Let's just say I have made this trip enough times to know that early morning long distance flights for all airlines tend to all depart at similar times which makes checking in and getting through security a beast. 

"You think?"  I said.  "I don't know.  I have seen it pretty crowded at this time."

"No, you are good.  I mean, I guess it is good you are getting their early because there is some fog."

"Wouldn't that mean a delay if there is fog," I thought to myself.

The driver then proceeded to tell me repeatedly as he filled out paper work that the Black Car Services' yard is just five minutes from my condo.  

"I mean you are right there," he said.

"Well if you are only five minutes away why did it take you twelve minutes to get here?" was the question running through my head.  And what was with this paperwork?  The beauty of this service in the past is that everything is pre-arranged in the App.  No paperwork.  Let's cut the chit chat and get this car rolling dude, or my "early arrival" you seem so concerned with will be practically non-existent.

"Is this paperwork thing new?" I asked.

"Oh, we have been doing it a couple of months.  Ever since the airport started cracking down on the unlicensed ride share drivers," he said.

"Yes, I was just reading about that.  I thought your Company's "cheaper" service "X" is now not allowed to go to the airport," I asked.

"Oh, I don't know about that.  I don't drive an "X" car.  I mean that is what they start you out on.  The rookies.  Like a training car.  I haven't done that in over a year," he said in an almost bragging tone.

We finally got on the road and made it to the airport with no trouble.  As we entered the departure level I saw my airline listed on the first sign.  And then I saw my airline disappear as my driver kept going. 

"Ummm...I think you just passed my airline," I said.

"No, your airline is in Terminal 2."

"Uh, well, I am pretty sure we passed it.  But if you think it is in Terminal 2, we shall see."

As we cleared Terminal 1...2...and 3; I think it was time for my driver to admit defeat and circle back around.

"Oh man they are going to think I am crazy. It costs $3 every time we go around."

We started the loop back around to Terminal 1 when I thought to myself, "This fool just took the wrong ramp.  We are now on the Arrivals level!"

"Uh...I think we are on the wrong level," I said.

"Oh man, I am so sorry! I will get you there now.  I know exactly where it is.  This is going to cost me another $3, but I know it is the first Terminal.  Don't worry."

Frankly, I wasn't worried.  I wasn't even mad.  This was down right funny.

We looped back around for another $3 and as we approached the departures level I said, "As we come out of the tunnel; it will be the first stop on the right."  

My driver began reading the signs.  He read off every airline but the one I wanted.

I interjected, "Not that sign.  The smaller sign to the right.  Do you see it?"

"Oh yeah.  There it is," he said.

After pulling up to the curb and getting out of the vehicle; I thanked my driver and wished him a good day. I thought again about how he said only the "rookie" drivers operate "X" cars.  Three attempts at finding my airline seemed like a pretty rookie move to me.

"I don't know man, after this rough start?" he said.

"Dude, you just got to shake it off," I said as I turned and walked through the sliding glass doors of the terminal.  "You just got to shake it off."

I've got a flight to catch!

Just America's Future . . .

Playing Words With Friends against anonymous opponents has given me more reason to fear the future of America if this is an example of a product of the American education system.

Meet Me . . .

The streets of the downtown Financial District in San Francisco are filled with office towers that reach towards the heavens creating a beautiful and unique skyline.  These office towers are filled with the headquarters of numerous large corporations.

The City by the Bay is also known for restaurants run by world renowned chefs.   So it is not a shock that the cafeterias of these large corporations can become the "hot" lunch meal ticket.

At one point the Gap cafeteria which is also known as the "Gapeteria" even had its own Yelp review. (A link that has mysteriously disappeared off the Yelp site.)

Why is the Gapeteria so popular?  

Well, first there is the view.  The largest of the Gapeterias sits on the seventh floor of their headquarters overlooking the Embarcadero.  On a clear day the view from the outside terraces is nothing short of spectacular.  The second reason the Gapeteria is popular is because of the reported high percentage of young professional single females that work for the company.

In recent years the Gapeteria faced competition from Google who allegedly offers free lunches to their employees.  One campus of these major corporations sit on opposite sides of the same street on the same block.  The Gapeteria is located on the North side of the street and the Google cafeteria is on the South side.  Both cafeterias face the Bay.  These two "G" cafeterias, Gap and Google, are now equally highly sought after invites from individuals who have building security clearance.   

Last month while walking down the street facing the Google headquarters I looked up and saw a series of signs hanging in the windows.

"Hi Gap!  Lunch On Your Deck?" said one.

Other signs had faces drawn on them with thought bubbles; but they all included a request for an invite to the Gapeteria.

This request seemed rather puzzling since the Google employees allegedly get free lunch. 

I turned around to look up at the Gap building to see if anyone had responded to the request and there were no postings.

This week as I went to meet a friend for lunch, I was walking toward the Gap building and there they were; responses back to all the Google requests for a lunch dates.

Notice that the Gap took the time to actually draw Google's rainbow logo on their sign.  Nice touch!

I am looking forward to see what next week's signs will say.

Hopefully the lunch date on 1/3/12 went well.

The Song Of The Day - Meet Me Halfway by the Black Eyed Peas

Baker Baker . . .

Tuesday is the Annual Turkey Day Pot Luck at work.

I volunteered to make the cornbread.

After getting home from work; I put on my Just Jon Apron, set out the ingredients and then realized that my cake pans were a casualty of moving last year.

So the corn "bread" became corn "muffins."

Happy early Thanksgiving!

The Song Of The Day - Baker Baker by Tori Amos

Window . . .

Did you know that over 750,000 people travel through Grand Central Terminal every day?   That is the equivalent to the entire population of the City of San Francisco.   This was just one of the facts I learned while on the audio tour of Grand Central Terminal in New York.

As you can see in these pictures Grand Central is a sea of people constantly moving in all directions.  If you look closely at the 60 foot tall glass windows at the end of the concourse you may notice that there are people walking through the middle of the window.   That is because the windows are actually double paned and are a passage way between the two office towers on each side of Grand Central Terminal.

So let's recap.  750K people a day in the terminal.  But you only see two people in the window passage.  Those two facts are key to the rest of this story.

For some reason I got it in my brain that I should be able to walk through the window passage.  Mind you it did seem a little odd that no one else was trying to find the stairwell to the giant window walkway.

Eventually I found an elevator and I got in with two other people.  We rode it several floors up and then  they got  out.   I took the elevator one more floor before getting off myself.  The elevator doors opened up on a nondescript hallway with two doors.

This should have been clue number one I was not supposed to be here.

I opened the door closest to where I assumed the window wall passage would be.  Hmmm.  This isn't the window wall passage.  Maybe it's this door over here?  I stepped into another nondescript hallway.  The door to the elevator bank closed behind me.  I then realized it had locked and for better of worse I was now trapped in an interior stair well in Grand Central Terminal.

I checked every door around me and they were all locked.

I could hear construction and workers several floors below me so I put on my innocent dumb tourist face and slowly walked down two flights of stairs until I was standing on one side of a gated yellow taped construction area deep in the interior of Grand Central.

I was able to get the attention of a rather large construction worker on the next floor landing.

"Um hi, do you know how I get out of here?" I asked coyly.

"Well how did you even get in here?" the big burly construction worker asked.

"So I was in the elevator and then I came through the door and then the door locked behind me," I said.

"Well you need to go back the way you came," he said.

"Right, I get that, but I can't because like I said the door closed behind me, is there like another way out?"

After a momentary pause and a roll of his eyes he said, "Go through that gate and come here."

I followed his instructions and he took me into an elevator lobby that was all yellow taped off.  It kind of looked like a scene from a movie where if I had stepped through the tape I would have fallen into an empty elevator shaft.

In what seemed like the longest three minutes of my life I stood silently without making eye contact with the construction worker as he tried to call the elevator to the floor we were on.  He told me he wasn't even sure the elevator was stopping on this floor because of the construction.

I said nothing.

Eventually the elevator doors opened up.  In an ironic twist the two people who had been in the elevator on my way up were now on their way back down.  They looked really surprised to see me, but I knew I was now home free.

Not deterred by my slight detour I was still determined to get into the window wall.  So I walked over to the audio tour ticket window.  For sure the people who pay for the audio tour get to go in the window wall right?

As the cashier was getting me the map and headset I asked, "Will this tour take me into the windows?"

She looked at me like I was crazy and said, "No!  That is a special tour that only happens once a month and you have to get approval from the Port Authority or something."

"Oh, cause I was kind of already up there I just couldn't get into the actual windows," I said.

"You SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN UP THERE," she said sternly.

"Sorry?!?" I said.  (A wise manager once told me - "It's easier to ask for forgiveness than it is to ask for permission.") 

The "Real" tour was quite informative with lots of trivia about Grand Central Terminal.

The Terminal even has a market which reminded me of a smaller version of Pike Place Market in Seattle.

So the lesson for the day Loyal Readers is to stick to the tour and don't try to go off the map when visiting Grand Central Terminal.  You will learn a lot but you won't get to go into the window wall.

The Song Of The Day - Window by Fiona Apple 

Mother And Father . . .

Today I had a good laugh when I checked to see if I had any mail at work.

There, sitting on top of the bills and catalogues was a postcard addressed to me; or so I thought.

I started to walk back to my desk while looking at the postcard and then realized it was addressed to "The Parent Of."

I haven't seen a letter addressed to "The Parents Of" me since I graduated high school.

Clearly this was a mistake as the postcard wanted my parents to learn more about how to pay for my eventual college education.

Apparently the four and a half years I spent at California State University, Northridge never happened.

Since my parents don't live in my office I figured I should turn the postcard over the next best equivalent to "parents" in the work environment.

Instead of going back to my desk I took the postcard to my Director and asked if she wanted to take on the roll of my parent.   I mean this is my college education we are talking about here.

She declined.

So I am currently accepting applications for surrogate parents in the Bay Area who are willing to start saving for my eventual second college degree.  (I didn't even think I wanted to go back to college until today.)

Since it has been a while since I have been a "student" I am probably going to need to take a few prep courses.  And this time I think I want to try living in the dorms; but just for one semester.   After the first semester I want to get an off campus apartment.  I can totally handle the responsibility.

This is going to be great!

All prospective donors can contact me by leaving a comment on this post =)

The Song Of The Day - Mother And Father by Madonna

Stuck In The Middle With You . . .

I was running "last minute" (not late) to a meeting at work on another floor earlier this week.

When I got to the elevator, the doors opened up and I saw a co-worker who was going to the same meeting I was already standing inside.

That was when my ears disconnected from my brain and my hand functions.

You see, as I stepped into the elevator and hit the button for the first floor I neglected to process the information that my co-worker was saying to me.

"I've been trapped in the elevator for five minutes and it hasn't gone anywhere.  When you hit the button the doors finally opened," she said.

I also neglected to take in her facial expression of "I JUST TOLD YOU I HAVE BEEN TRAPPED IN THE ELEVATOR DUMB ASS!  NOW YOU JUST CAUSED THE DOORS TO CLOSE AGAIN AND BOTH OF US ARE TRAPPED!"

Ooops.

I tried to use my employee badge to trigger the elevator to take us to another floor but that did not work.

I leaned down and hit the call button key.

An automated voice came over the speaker to tell me that I was in elevator #3 at _____ address.

Um yeah...I am well aware of where I am thank you very much.

Then a woman's voice came over the speaker and she asked where I was.

I told her my co-worker and I were trapped in elevator #3.

Her next question I thought was rather stupid.

"Are you an employee?"

"YES! I am an employee!"

But what should that have mattered.  Would this be more or less of a priority if I say I am not an employee?

The woman then said she would alert maintenance to the situation.

My co-worker was periodically hitting the buttons and eventually the doors sprung open.

We both quickly exited the elevator.

Knowing that we were late for our meeting we were about to hit the call button for elevator 2 when I said I thought we should put a sign in front of elevator 3 to make sure no one else got trapped.

My co-worker went and got a Post-it note as I moved an artist easel that was in the lobby to block the elevator door.

Feeling like we had done the right thing we continued on our way to the meeting.

When we reached to first floor we stopped at the security desk to let them know we had been trapped and that the elevator was broken.

The security guard said, "I know.  It is all taken care of now.  The elevator is locked on the fourth floor."

"Well, we just want to make sure no one else gets in it," we said.

The guard then gestured at the security monitor and said, "Don't worry, we put a sign in front of the door."

My co-worker and I looked at each other and then back at the security guard and said, "We put the sign in front of the elevator.  No one came and saved us."

Suddenly I no longer cared about the harrowing five minutes I was trapped in the elevator; I just wanted proper credit for saving everyone else on the fourth floor from getting into elevator 3.

My priorities are totally clear.

The Song Of The Day - Stuck In The Middle With You by Louise

I'm So Stupid . . .

This was a story I was not going to share on the blog.  But then I thought about how much Loyal Reader Erin likes when I label stories "Dumb."

I also told the story a couple times last week at work, and each time I shared it I laughed a little harder.

So this story from Hawaii is for Erin and anyone else who has done something stupid.

If you have ever rented a car and read the fine print on the rental contract, you may have seen that the rental car agency can charge a large fee if you return your vehicle with substantial mud, dirt or sand on the interior.

Being that I find that I most often am renting a car while vacationing in a tropical place; the chances of getting mud, dirt, or sand in the car are highly likely.

As Loyal Reader Megan will attest...Uncle Just Jon likes to keep his car clean!  And if you have ever ridden in my car and I have apologized for it being dirty, you were probably thinking to yourself, "what dirt?"

So you can only imagine the minor "pani" I was having as the parents and I got in and out of the rental car while traveling the Road To Hana.  With each stop to see a waterfall or beach the rain soaked ground created the trifecta of evil (mud/dirt/sand) to be tracked into the rental Pontiac G6.

By the final evening in Hawaii I had to accept the fact that there was a good chance we were going to incur the "dirty interior" fee when we turned the car in the next day.

"Maybe not," I thought to myself!

So Friday evening I took the car into the nearest town and found a gas station with a car wash.  I changed my dollar bills for quarters and drove the car over to the GIANT self service industrial vacuum cleaner.

After inserting my quarters the vacuum cleaner fired up like a jet engine ready to suck my trifecta of evil away.

In and out and up and down I climbed over the seat and into the trunk trying my hardest to get as much dirt out of the car.  It was cleaner, but not as clean as I would have liked it to be.

Next up was the self drive thru exterior car wash.

I pulled up to the control panel and typed in the code the gas station attendant had provided me.

Nothing happened.

After sitting in the car a few minutes with no washing action going on; the attendant (who was going on her break ) saw my sorry self sitting in the car wash with nothing happening.

"You gotz to put in da code," she yelled!

"I know! I thought I did," I said.

"Givez me your ticket," she said.

I handed her the ticket and she walked over to the control panel and re-typed in my wash code.  Immediately all the bells, whistles, and lights turned on.

I watched the overhead apparatus as it started spraying soap on the front hood of the rental car, followed by the windshield, onto the sunroof...

OH MY GAWD!!!!

Apparently I had not fully closed the rear passenger door when I finished vacuuming because as I looked over my shoulder to the back seat I could see more and more white soap covering the interior of the car!

OH $@&%   OH $@&%   OH $@&%!!!!

I flung my seat belt off and dove over the seat for the back passenger door and was able to pull it closed!

Now all I could do was wait for the car wash to complete its cycle.

Hurry up! Hurry up! Hurry up!

To be honest with you, I am not sure I did wait for it to complete its cycle.  Because at the first green light I pulled out of the wash garage and immediately parked next to one of the gas pumps.  I jumped out of the car and pulled as many paper towels from the window wash squeegee bucket dispenser and started wiping down the interior of the back seat area.

At one point I saw the station attendant watching me dry the interior of the car while shaking her head.

"Please don't watch," I thought, I already feel stupid enough as is.

I was able to get the soap off the interior of the car and use the damp towels to wipe more of the residual mud and dirt off the floor mats that the vacuum could not suck up.

In the end I guess it turned out OK because I didn't get charged for interior dirt when we turned the car in the next morning.

That's what I get for trying to do the right thing.

The Song Of The Day - I'm So Stupid by Madonna

Get Stupid . . .

Further evidence that I might not be the sharpest tool in the shed.

After discovering that the Drive Thru entrance to Starbucks was blocked I parked the car and walked up to the front door only to discover that the location is still being built.

The Song Of The Day - Get Stupid by Madonna

Mirror . . .

Mirror mirror on the wall who is the one who didn't think through this plan at all?

Just Jon!

My new place means new furniture and over the holidays I spied the Chunky Wood Floor Mirror from West Elm and began obsessing over this dark brown grain beauty.  And thanks to the US Postal Service who asked what catalogs I would like to receive at my new address I was also the owner of a "Welcome To The Neighborhood" 10% off coupon for West Elm.  

Cha Ching!

I took the drive over the Bay Bridge more than once to visit this mirror and by the third trip I knew that I had to have it.  I also knew that there was slim to no chance this mirror would fit in my car.

That is when I started to plot out how I would get the mirror from the East Bay to The City.

Uhaul!

Since I was saving 10% on the Mirror I could put that savings toward the rental of this Cargo Van for $19.95!

And all was good.

All was good until I got behind the wheel of the Cargo Van and realized I had never driven a vehicle this big before and I was going to have to take it through San Francisco over the Bay Bridge into a parking structure and back.

No, worries!  I'll just drive this van around the block a couple times till I get used to how it handles.

(I never got used to it.)

Now Loyal Readers, I have handled many a floor mirror by myself while working all those years in retail.  I was quite confident that with the dolly I rented from Uhaul I would have no problem getting the mirror from the Van to my home.  That is until I saw that it took TWO West Elm employees to wheel the mirror out of the stockroom to my van.

Gulp.

"I hope you have someone who can help you with this on the other end," one of the West Elm employees said to me.  

"Uh, not exactly," I replied.

"Maybe you can knock on a neighbor's door and see if they will help you, " he suggested.

"Sure," I said not very confidently.

And off I went with the mirror in the back of the van over the bridge while starting to sweat thinking about the task ahead.

That was when divine intervention happened.

When I was at the Uhaul center picking up the van there were tons of undocumented day laborers begging for work.  I could drive past the Uhaul center on the way home and hire someone to help me.  (Insert angels singing here!)

After about a minute of internal moral debate about my non-existent political career being over if it ever leaked out that I hired an illegal immigrant to do work for me I rolled down the window and said, "One," to the crowd of gentlemen on the corner.

My new hero "Jacob" quickly assessed the situation and my espanol skills.  He determined that I was best in the role of supervisor and should not assist in moving the mirror at all.

After we got the mirror into my unit; Jacob and I headed back to the Uhaul center to return him and the van.  I handed Jacob a $20 for a task that took all of seven minutes to complete.  I am pretty sure we are best friends now and are going to hang out next weekend on the corner.

In hindsight I maybe should have kept Jacob around a little longer.  

When I got back to my place I started to unpack the mirror.  The box was like Fort Knox.  There was boxes within boxes within Styrofoam within wood planks.  I finally reached the mirror and could barely lift it up off the floor.  I could have really used Jacob's help about now.

After A LOT of struggling with the mirror I finally got it positioned against a wall where I was pleased.

And as for all that money I saved with my 10% off coupon; well by the time I paid for the van, the bridge toll, the gas to return the van with a full tank, the .99 a mile I didn't realize was being charged on top of the $19.99 rental fee, and my day laborer; I saved nothing!

But the mirror looks good!

The Song Of The Day - Texas In The Mirror by Michelle Branch

Heartburn . . .

One of the things my body has blessed me with since entering my thirties is acid reflux and heartburn.   Thanks self you rock!

I was in Walgreens the other day looking at medications to help the aforementioned afflictions when I noticed on the box for Prilosec OTC there was a list of tips for managing heartburn.

That is so helpful I thought to myself.   Let's see here . . .

1.  Do Not Lie Flat Or Bend Over After Eating.   

OK, so that is really going to hamper my TV time.  I lie flat on the couch eating while watching TV.

2.  Do Not Wear Tight Fitting Clothing Around The Stomach.

Ummm...my pants are tight because I decided to lay down on the couch, eat, and watch TV rather than go to the gym, duh!

3.  Do Not Eat Before Bedtime.

Define bedtime please.

4.  Raise The Head Of Your Bed.

Like a Craftmatic Adjustable Bed?  Because I sleep on my stomach and those never looked like they would be comfortable for me.

5.  Avoid Heartburn Causing Foods Such As Rich Spicy, Fatty, Or Fried Foods, Chocolate, Caffeine, Alcohol, And Certain Fruits And Vegetables.

So this pretty much wipes out everything when the list contains both bad and good for you foods.  And we know I am not giving up chocolate.

6.  Eat Slowly And Avoid Big Meals.

I could handle this one.

7.  If Overweight, Lose Weight.

Please see my response to #1.

8.  Quit Smoking.

I am good with that one too.

After reviewing the list I saw the price of Prilosec OTC and opted for a bottle of Tums instead.

Take that heartburn!

The Song Of The Day - Heartburn by Alicia Keys

My Elevator . . .

Things that make you go hmmmm.

When the permit for the elevator you ride most often expired almost two years ago.

The Song Of The Day - Elevator by Flo Rida feat. Timbaland

Whatcha Think About That . . .

I would like to thank my boss for bringing this to my attention.

The above photo shows part of the actual sample ballot in San Francisco.

Please note the fifth candidate for Member of the Board of Education.  Also note his/her qualifications for being on the Board of Education.

This is not a joke!

Only in San Francisco!

The Song Of The Day - Whatcha Think About That by The Pussycat Dolls Featuring Missy Elliott

M O N E Y . . .

In 1990 my mother gave me the above Coca-Cola plastic piggy bank.  I vowed to only put pennies into this bank.

Over the years the bank has moved from home to home to apartment to apartment from So Cal to Nor Cal.  As the years have gone by the pennies became to much for the aging plastic to contain and cracks started to form.  Packing tape was strategically placed over the cracks in hopes of keeping the bank in one piece until it was filled to the top.

Recently it was clear that the bank was not going to make it much longer.

So yesterday I decided to cash in.

I looked up where the nearest Coinstar was located.  I also knew that I had about as close of a parking space as I was going to get to my apartment if I was going to attempt to move this bank.

Unfortunately the bank was so heavy I could barely move it.

So I made the strategic decision to empty the bank into two nondescript reusable shopping bags.

Despite being separated into two bags I could still barely lift the pennies.  This was going to require the use of my "granny cart" if I was going to make it to my car.

I got the granny cart filled with pennies to the corner and realized for the first time just how steep the hill my car was parked on top of was.

Halfway up the hill I was sweating and out of breath!  The pennies were ridiculously heavy!

When I reached the market with the Coinstar I popped the trunk open and took the first bag of pennies out.  The strap on the bag immediately ripped and the bag of pennies went splat onto the rain soaked asphalt.  I lifted the bag from the bottom this time and waddled into the store.

This was my first time using a Coinstar and I was mortified at how much noise these machines make.   Especially since I knew that I was going to have to do this process twice!

Slowly but surely I put handful after handful of pennies into the tray and fed them into the tiny slot.

As I loaded the pennies into the tray I thought back to 1991 high school chemistry class with Mrs. Reeves where we did an experiment that changed the color of pennies to "gold."   Deep inside me that was the only penny I kind of wanted to keep.  But that would be like finding a needle in a haystack to recover one penny.

The first bag finished processing and was a total of 5,886 pennies!   That was $53.54 after the service charge was deducted!  Pretty cool because this was the smaller one of my two grocery bags of pennies!

I went out to the car and carefully picked up the second bag of pennies from the bottom and again waddled my way into the store to start the process over.

About halfway through counting the second bag of pennies a miracle happened!

Glistening like the north star in the tray of pennies to be processed was my "Gold" penny from high school!

Hooray!

The second bag finished counting and totaled up to a whopping $73.52!

In total that was 13,897 pennies in 20 years that I pulled out of my pocket or $127.06!

The funniest part was when I went to the cashier to redeem my Coinstar vouchers.  I didn't even think about the chance that I would be given pennies back.  As the cashier redeemed the first voucher for $53.54 I heard the change dispenser go clink clink clink.  I looked down and saw four Abraham Lincoln's looking at me!  How ironic that I just gave away almost 14 thousand pennies to get four back!  That is just a cruel joke!

The Song Of The Day - Money Honey by Lady Gaga

Whatcha Say . . .

For anyone who has ever waited in line at a Starbucks at 8:30 in the morning there can be up to 30 people waiting for their coffee.

Under normal protocol when the barista finishes preparing your drink they will yell out, "I have a grande non-fat white chocolate mocha for _______" at which point you walk up and take your drink.

So today I couldn't help but laugh when the barista yelled out, "I have a coffee."

No size on that coffee.  No name for who she made it.  Just coffee.

Really?  A coffee?  At Starbucks?  You don't say.

The Song Of The Day - Whatcha Say by Jason DeRulo

My Neck . . .

Ladies, this is just a wardrobing suggestion. Store can not be held responsible for related neck or back injuries sustained from wearing your purse around your neck.

The Song Of The Day - My Neck My Back by Khia

Spinning Around Move Out Of My Way . . .

What happens after several glasses of wine and conversations about childhood activities...

Somersault challenge!

Thanks Shamoli for catching the moment on film.

The Song Of The Day - Spinning Around by Kylie Minogue

What Are You Looking At . . .

When the Walgreens cashier asked if I wanted a bag for my purchase I was hoping for something a little more discrete than the giant clear plastic garbage bag that she proceeded to put my item into.

After a long day at work I was not really looking forward to navigating the center aisle of a crowded bus with my giant trash bag of toilet paper.

It was amazing the stares I got from people as I walked down the street with my clear Santa Claus sack filled with Quilted Northern.

Then, once I got on the bus it was like people didn't want to stand close to the guy with the twelve pack of TP.

OK, maybe the stares were not because of the twelve double rolls of toilet paper in my clear garbage bag.

Maybe, just maybe, people were staring at my pants that I had rolled up to be "man" Capris.

It was 86 degrees in San Francisco today.  I stand proud in my rolled up pants and TOMS shoes.

Oh, and if you need to borrow any toilet paper, I have a few rolls!

The Song Of The Day - Vogue By Madonna

Push The Button Don't Push The Button . . .

If you stay late enough at work, you need to use your security badge to make the elevators operate.

Last week I was perplexed when I could not get the elevator to go down.

I was leaving the office at a semi-decent time.  I mean the nightly cleaning crew had just reached my floor.

Yet try as I may, the elevator was not going anywhere.

In between changing the song on my iPhone and checking email I kept hitting the button over and over again.

And then I realized I hadn't ever hit the "1" button; I had been pressing the button for the floor I was already on.

Awesome!

The Song Of The Day - Hollywood by Madonna

Rock & Roll . . .

Last night my concert buddies (Loyal Reader Erin and her sister Michelle) and I went to see Ray LaMontagne and David Gray perform at the Greek Theatre on the U.C. Berkeley campus.

It was my intention to drive to the show and meet Erin and Michelle there.  When I arrived at work several co-workers said that they thought it would be easier to take BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit) to the concert.  At the last minute I decided to leave my car at work and try BART.

I arrived in downtown Berkeley with my stadium seat in tow.  After picking up a sandwich at Quiznos I proceeded to walk to the theatre.  Once on the Cal Berkeley campus I couldn't help but be impressed with what a beautiful institution it is.

From the day I graduated college I vowed I had no desire to ever go back to school and get a masters degree.  For the first time on the Berkeley campus I suddenly thought, I could go back to school.  I want to be a Cal Bear.  I could learn the *#@+ out of this place!

By the time my mid-thirties body had hiked up the hill to the theatre my mind had moved well past going back to school and was focused on finding my seat.

There was an opening act but I have no idea who she was.

For the main show Ray performed first.  If you are unfamiliar with his work I highly recommend you become acquainted with his CD entitled Trouble.  Loyal readers may recall that "Trouble" was my #4 Desert Island Disc.

I can only describe Ray's voice as "BUTTER!"  He is the male version of Sara McLachlan.  Ray comes across as shy and humble.  He spoke very few words to the audience.  In fact other than the part where he introduced the band, Erin counted that he only said eight words the whole night.

Before a song would start he would say, "One, two, three, four,"

and after a song would finish he would say, "Thank you.  Thank you very much."

I am all for artist conversations with the audience, but in this instance I would just have to sit back and enjoy a true artist who can sing and play guitar live with no gimmicks.

Here is Ray performing his song Trouble.

After Ray performed there was a brief intermission and then David Gray came out.

I will be honest, I was there to see Ray and really only knew one David Gray song, Babylon.  (Erin and Michelle were the David fans in our trio.)

In stark contrast to Ray's low key performance, David is a virtual bobble head of bouncy energy on stage.   I don't think his head ever stopped moving.

David's portion of the show was very engaging and despite not knowing his body of work I was drawn into his performance.

Here is David performing his big hit Babylon.

For the finale Ray joined David on stage for a duet.  In my opinion they could drop the duet from the concert because it wasn't that great.

On a side note for all the Generation Xer's out there; before the show started Michelle pointed out the women sitting across from us looked like Tabitha Soren, the former MTV VJ from the early 90s.  I didn't think it was her, but we did refer to her as Tabitha several times in conversation.

Today I looked Tabitha Soren up on the Internet to see what happened to her.

Guess what?  She now goes by the name Tabitha Lee Lewis and lives in Berkeley, CA with her children and husband Michael who wrote the book The Blind Side.

Way to go Michelle for spotting Generation X's Walter Cronkite!

After the show the crowd of people began working their way out of the outdoor theatre.  I followed a group back through the Berkeley campus to the BART station.

There were two flaws to my master transportation plan:

a.  I think BART stops running at midnight (it was now 11:20 pm).
b.  I had no idea what train to get on to get back to San Francisco.

The first train that pulled into the station said "Fremont."

Well I knew I didn't want to go to Fremont.  I wanted something that would go to the other side of the Bay.

Erin called my cell to make sure I had made it to the BART station right as I was trying to decide what to do.

Everyone in the crowded station was piling into the Fremont bound train.

"Should I be getting on this train too?"

I told Erin I needed to go because I had to figure out what to do.  As I ended the call with Erin the doors on the train closed and I was left standing alone on the platform.

Uh oh, I suddenly had a bad feeling.

After the Fremont train pulled away from the platform the station agent came on the public address system as if to announce to me and only me that there were no more direct trains to San Francisco.  Any passengers wishing to go to San Francisco will need to board the Fremont train and transfer to the Millbrae train at the MacArthur Station.

Ummm, that information would have been really helpful about two minutes ago!

I looked up at the monitor to see when the next Fremont bound train was coming.

16 Minutes!

Ugh!

Slowly the station began to fill up with more people who had just left the concert so I was no longer alone.

The Fremont train finally arrived and I hopped on board.  Within a few minutes we were to the MacArthur Station and fortunately a Millbrae bound train pulled in at the same time.

Like Cinderella watching the clock tick toward midnight I was happy to have made it onto a train back into the City before service ended for the night.

When we reached the City I decided it would be easier to catch a bus to my apartment rather than walk back to work to pick up my car.

In the end, I am not sure that time and stress involved with taking BART to the concert out weighed the cost savings of parking fees at U.C. Berkeley and the Bay Bridge Toll.

At least now I know for the future, when given the opportunity, GET ON THE FREMONT TRAIN!

The Song Of The Day - Like Rock & Roll And Radio by Ray LaMontagne